Road Rage Thursday

Ok, in this universe, GREEN MEANS GO Yes, it’s a very pretty green, especially at night, when it’s all dark and it makes the pretty light all bright and shiny, but Shit-for-Brains, when the light is green – GO YOU STUPID FUCK . If I miss one more green because the first guy is just looking at the pretty light, I will kill them with a spoon in their sleep. (That is, if I find out who it is)

Now, for the other people, red means stop. Yep, everyone wants to jump the light and everyone inches, but inching so you are IN THE MIDDLE OF THE INTERSECTION WHEN ONCOMING TRAFFIC HAS A GREEN LIGHT I will watch you get hit and laugh like a madwoman when you claim they ran the red light.

Ok, now, for the others.

In New Jersey, they have jughandles (and the rage for the crackhead who invented them, don’t even get me started, Nessa, do you agree with that) you have to get in the right lane to make a left turn. There are signs for several blocks stating – RIGHT LANE TO MAKE LEFT And after the turn the right lane may continue for a few feet and then JUST END . If you are in NJ for an hour, you will find these out and figure them out. So. ASSHAT who decided to change lanes (sometimes 2 lanes of traffic) at the last minute. YOU LOSE YOUR JUGHANDLE PRIVILAGES If you don’t get into the lane soon enough, you must go to the next jughandle and hope it’s a jughandle and not an actual left turn .

New Jersey has some bad drivers and the crackhead in Trenton who came up with the regulations KILL THEM ALL

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No. Well, yeah.

I’m getting steroid injections (shut up) The CT scan didn’t show anything wrong. Of course, CT scans look at bones so, yeah I have a spine, but it doesn’t tell me if I have pinched nerves or herniated discs which are causing extreme pain in my arms. Yes, I said arms. It is now both my arms. Of course, the injections are the way of my ortho saying GET AN MRI SO WE CAN TELL WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU. (but that’s just my opinion) I would get one, Doc, just give me mass quanities of drugs.

And to the fucking fuckwad who parked so close to me. I DENTED THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR DOOR GETTING INTO MY CAR That’s what you get for parking in my spot. Yes, she actually parked in the same spot as me. There are lines – park between them. And don’t be a fuckhead and say ” I parked between two lines” THERE WAS ALREADY A CAR PARKED IN A SPOT. Any reason you felt it necessary to leave NOroombetweenthecars so that I had to keep pushing my door to get in. SO yeah, I dented and probably scratched your car up. I DON’T CARE (this road rage thursday is a little early or late depending on how you look at it)

Hanukah went well. Thanks to all for the Hanukah wishes. Ended up having a great time. No big messes and only a little bleeding (my cousins kid walked into a wall and got a bloody lip No big deal Pediatrician sister (mine) knew what to do. She got a lovely parting gift. 4 bags of garbage to put in her dumpster. I ran out of room in my garage to put garbage and was mortified by how much garbage there was so I made my dad take some to her apt garbage dumpster to throw it away.

Did I mention I have to get injections IN MY NECK

Road Rage 3 (a little late)

Dude in brown piece of crap…..there are these things called brakes in your car.  The pedal is on the floor, it’s the smaller pedal on the left.    Learn to use it.  They work, see what you do, is when you are flying down the road and there is a car in front of you,  you apply the brake instead of changing lanes (without signaling, but since you don’t know how brakes work, I don’t even want to get in to signals).  See when you change lanes, you CUT ME OFF AND THEN I HAVE TO SLAM ON MY BRAKES BECAUSE THERE ISN’T ENOUGH ROOM FOR YOU TO GET IN MY LANE

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I have 10 minutes

I gave myself until 6 pm to go computer-less for 3 days.

Road Rage Thursday #2

Oooooooo you gunned your engine.  Does that mean I should let you cut me off when I’ve been sitting in traffic for 20 minutes and 3 red light cycles   Get the fuck out of here you loser.   You drive a fucking racing car to make up for a small penis you K-fed wanna be

hey, you in the SUV, on the phone.  Yeah you dumbass.    There are 2 lanes, clearly marked on the road and the sign     one is for left turn only, one is for right turn only.    GUESS WHICH ONE YOU SHOULD BE IN IF YOU ARE MAKING A LEFT TURN     Really, you want to go with the right lane as your answer    GOOD, GET HIT YOU DUMB FUCK    And get off the phone.

(6 minutes left)

The above is not a rant against SUV’s  I have a small suv, it’s against stupid drivers.

See ya all on Monday.

A new category

I am declaring Thursdays   Road Rage Thursday

No, you can’t get out of your car and rip someone’s arm off and beat them with it, but you can complain about it.    Every Thursday, I am going to do my Road Rage complaining for the week.   So sad that I can actually dedicate a day to stupid drivers.    Thank goodness though, I wouldn’t have a job if it weren’t for bad drivers.

So……

To the dumb fuck in the red corolla…..the left lane is a passing lane.  I was attempting to pass the truck but since you decided to drive up my ass when I was going 80 mph and honk and blink your lights, no, I’m not gonna know.  Go ahead pass me.   Then I will change lanes and when you get stuck behind the 18 wheeler and want to pass him, I will stay steady in the right lane so you get boxed in.  Yeah I’m a bitch like that.  You know, it’s not really a fast lane, the left lane, it’s a passing lane.  If you get pulled over doing 80, you will still get a ticket.  I know my insurance laws, I know my road rules and statutes.   So go ahead, drive up my ass, when traffic comes to a stop, as it does during rush hour, you’ll hit me and then I will make a bi claim against you.

Fucker

Feel free to comment or do your own RRT entry.   I hate stupid people.