So, I was had a doctor’s appointment on Thursday for a steroid injection to relieve the pain from my neck into my arm. I was actually looking forward to it because I have been in a lot of pain and really needed the shot.
Fine, I fill out the 90 pages of questions about the pain
Q: Does the pain make you eat more, less or the same?
A: The same, I am a cow and love pasta and chocolate.
Q: What do you hope the injection will accomplish?
A: I hope it makes the pain so unbearable that I will kill the next 17 people I see. (Ok, I really answered, I want the pain to go away)
Q: Do you feel the pain has affected your life?
A: Yes, it’s pain, it makes hurt, I don’t like hurt or pain. Make it stop (yes that was my real answer, by this time I was on page 1000 of the questionaire and every time I turned the page, more pages were created)
So Thursday morning I get my directions and the 7000 page questionaire and I leave the house. But first, I pick up J at the garage where she is getting her car fixed and drop her off at work. Then I go on my merry way to the doctors office.
It’s easy to find, the directions are exact. BUT…. I am early, luckily I brought a book. So I read some. Then I check the door because it’s 8:25 and my appt is 8:30. There is an insane woman there. She asks who I am seeing. I tell her. She says I don’t think he is in this office today. Let me call him. She does, gets him on the phone and then tells me that he is seeing patients in the other office today. Fine – clerical error, they pulled the wrong directions, no big. She knows where the office is and I follow her there (not a bright move, but I was in my own car and had a cell so I felt safe, that if she was taking me somewhere that was creepy, I would drive away)
So we get to the doctors office, and I go in. Crazy helpful lady tells me that she was talking to the doctor and he was screaming at his office for the screw up. I’m like whatever, they pulled the wrong directions. She said, he said I wouldn’t have to wait since they messed up.
Doesn’t this conversation sound like he was in the office
So I go in. The nurse/receptionist tells me it’s going to be 20 minutes because I was late I’m like No way, I was late because your’re office messed up and sent me the wrong directions. The doctor just said I wouldn’t have to wait.
N/R – The doctor isn’t here. He doesn’t actually work out of this office.
ME WHAT Then who am I seeing.
N/R The nurse practioner Billy
Ok, and I apologize to any NP’s out there but NO I don’t see NP’s I have seen them and it’s always bad. The first one I went to told me I was pregnant. Except at that time. I HAD NEVER HAD SEX BEFORE , so I knew pregnancy was really not the cause of my messed up cycle. He insisted on doing a pregnancy test and then said, oh, your’re right, your’re not pregnant
The 2nd time I went they told me I had a sinus infection (which I did) and they gave me antibiotics and when I went back she said it was still there and gave me more antibiotics (It’s now 3 years and I still get chronic sinus infections)
The last time I went to a NP, he sent me for a blood test and then told me I had a kidney infection. He kept asking me (sorry for the graphic) if I had blood in my urine or pain when I peed. He basically called me a liar. Trust me I would know if I was in pain when I was peeing. I’m pretty sure I am there when I pee and would be aware of pain since I don’t like pain, I would whine and see a doctor.
So, when she said I was going to see a NP I was pissed. But I went along. She said he can do everything the doctor does except give an injection. UM, WHAT I was here to get in injection.
NP oh no, first you see Billy (really, if your seeing patients, use Bill or William, Billy makes you sound 5) and then you see the doctor.
Except the doctor doesn’t see patients Well he does 2 days a week and he’s booked for abotu 4 months.
At that point, I am livid. Why did I have to make an appointment to see a doctor, at an office that he doesn’t see patients at, when I don’t even get to see a doctor. I was so pissed I just left.
Then I find out he’s a doctor but not an MD. That means he can right Dr. I never see patients. But can’t write – Dr. I never see patients. MD.
He’s an osteopath or something. And that’s a huge sign in my book of quack central. I don’t care if a nurse does the needle or an MD does the needle, but it ain’t gonna be a NP or an effin osteopath. You are putting a needle in my neck. I want someone who has some medical background. But that’s just me. I am odd like that. I know lots of people that don’t mind NP or osteopaths My sister sees NP’s She won’t go to an osteopath because they aren’t MD’s but I have a thing against both.
So, I didn’t get an injection, I am still in a lot of fucking pain and I still can’t hold by princess or my boys because of that whole losing feeling in my arm thing.
I go back to the ortho (an MD) next week. I will talk to him about other things to do. But I will not go to an osteopath who doesn’t see patients. Fucking waste of a morning.